As a medical anthropologist who has worked in the field of creativity for over a decade, I’ve observed one of the most common ways parents unintentionally hinder their child’s creative development: fixating on reality.
While every parent wants their child to be able to recognize and understand the world around them - learning the correct names for objects, people, and animals - this emphasis on ‘correctness’ can leave little room for play, fantasy, and imagination.
Take, for example, a child who paints a blue dog. Some parents might instantly correct them, saying, ‘Dogs aren’t blue.’ Or, if a dog is drawn without a tail, they may ask, ‘Where’s the dog’s tail?’ or point out, ‘Something’s missing.’ These reactions often stem from a well-intentioned desire for the child to grasp objective reality - what colors animals, trees, or the sky ‘should’ be - and from an underlying fear that their child may not be ‘seeing’ or ‘understanding’ things correctly.
However, this fixation on whether the child accurately perceives the world can reflect deeper concerns: the fear that their child isn’t ‘developing correctly,’ that they are ‘behind’ other children, or even that the child is ‘too much in their own world.’ These fears are reinforced by a culture of constant comparison and measurement that begins as early as infancy. Medical tests, developmental checklists, and standardized milestones all bombard parents with benchmarks that suggest how their child should be progressing. If their child appears to deviate from these norms, parents often worry. For many parents, these fears extend beyond the present moment. They project into the future, imagining scenarios where their child struggles to cope in the ‘real’ world - where others are faster, smarter, and more successful, leaving their child behind.
Even in creative activities, where there are no clear right or wrong answers, these anxieties can creep in. When a child makes unconventional choices - such as drawing a pink lake or a purple tree - parents might mistakenly view these creative expressions as a sign that the child isn’t processing the world ‘correctly’ or doesn’t grasp basic concepts. The problem with this mindset is that it leaves little room for creative exploration. Creativity isn’t about accurately replicating reality; it’s about reimagining and playing with it.
When parents focus too heavily on factual accuracy, especially in activities like painting or pretend play, children may become hesitant to explore freely. They might begin to fear that their imaginative ideas will be corrected or dismissed for not being ‘realistic’ enough. This kind of restriction can limit a child’s ability to think creatively, take risks, and develop confidence in their own ideas.
A blue dog in a child’s drawing isn’t a misunderstanding of the world - it’s an imaginative choice or perhaps a reflection of a special fondness for the color blue. Creativity allows children to experiment with possibilities beyond the everyday, inviting them to explore new and exciting versions of reality. When parents allow their children the freedom to explore ideas that may not ‘make sense’ to adults, they help cultivate a type of thinking essential for innovation, problem-solving, and resilience. Many of the world’s greatest creative thinkers started by asking, ‘What if?’ instead of ‘What is?’
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